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But problems arise, she says, when users “lose their ability to control” that behavior.

She estimates that men comprise 60% of the clients who come to her center seeking help for sexual online compulsivity issues.

Moreover, Young says, the sheer variety of sexual experiences offered by the Internet can present a challenge to monogamous relationships.

This is a little unfair, I realize, this testing of my spouse’s reactions to my exploration of Internet sex, all in the name of journalism.

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But, he says, the real-world functionality of computer-enabled sex toys hasn’t really caught up with its potential.

“There are some cool ideas that just don’t work in implementation,” he says.

The “Sinulator,” for example, produced by Sinulate Entertainment in Sunnyvale, California, is a wireless vibrator that connects to any computer with an Internet hookup and a Windows operating system.

The Sinulator’s counterpart is the “Interactive Fleshlight,” a penis sleeve for men that transmits in-and-out action into vibrations for the Sinulator on the other end.

I was having sex with a Dutch girl when my wife walked in. “I don’t like the phrase ‘virtual sex,’” Lynn says, “because it trivializes the experience.

“It’s not sex but it is sex,” says Regina Lynn, author of The Sexual Revolution 2.0 and a columnist on sex and technology for

“Just install the software,” says Sinulate’s web site, “plug in your Interactive Fleshlight, and pick a partner!