The purported “news” was never good: Smart women are less likely to marry.Successful men are romantically interested only in their secretaries.And, if you search for happiness from the outside (whether it be a great pair of shoes, ice cream, a race car, or other people) you will be disappointed.
CHAPTER 2 | Overqualified for Love Imagine, as newspapers and magazines recently have, the “plight of the high-status woman.” She is a well-educated young woman in her 30s, earns a good salary, and has a great social life — but she is single and is worried that her success might be the reason she has not met a man to marry.
Any hint of bad news about the successful or talented has always made headlines, but media pessimism about the happiness and life balance of millions of young, career-oriented women has struck a chord nationwide.
How then can today’s “superwomen” nurture relationships with potential life partners?
If you are still waiting for Prince Charming ask yourself if you are ready to enter into a relationship that demands attention and emotional maturity.
So how then does the successful woman reach the higher level of emotional maturity-Interdependence? Instead, do soul searching for your own emotional and physical needs. Women need to begin to admit they have needs and define them. Identify the qualities in a Prince that are required to meet those needs. These are qualities in a partner that you need in order to help you be a better person. For example, if your Prince is upset and terminates a conversation, do not repeatedly call him. Men want to do things to contribute to our happiness. The Feminist Movement brought women from dependant to independent. We have lost the ability to identify our own happiness and the Princes are left with no role in our lives.
She should take specific steps toward inner growth, and if you are searching for the secret for developing lasting relationships, consider the following: 1. What are the qualities in a man that will inspire and motivate you? Discuss the short term and long term goals for your life with your Prince. This will deter him from wanting to speak with you and possibly lead to a restraining order. When he asks where you want to go for dinner, TELL HIM… Now it’s time that women move ahead to the higher level of maturity… Being Interdependent does not mean that we will turn back the Feminist Movement and end up in the roles of our mothers.
the stories of the damsel in distress being rescued by a handsome hero and living happily ever after.
Those stories illustrate how once the princess gets married, she will be happy because the prince will make her happy.
But this scenario can easily be transformed into a positive experience: if you respond to his questions with, “I’d love jumbo shrimp,” then the prince will be thrilled to find the best shrimp restaurant in the land. When men feel that they cannot make a woman happy, they become frustrated and they often lose interest.
Instead of brewing frustration he’ll be proud of himself when the best jumbo shrimp in town are appreciatively devoured. Yes, they will even lose interest in that fantastic, successful independent woman!
Identify how each of you will contribute to reaching those goals. Instead, take time off, occupy your time with a distraction (like an outing with friends) and allow time to pass for things to cool off and for him to miss you. It means that we are open to a connection and partnership where we admit we have needs and allow our Princes to meet our needs.