But if he is routinely expressing those bad feelings about her within earshot of you, his preoccupation with his divorce or separation may mean that he has some unresolved feelings.
Perhaps he’s not yet ready to share his heart with another person.
We are never responsible for our partner’s actions; they are their own people.
Take note if your partner is: Badmouthing His Ex Sure, it can be pretty common for people to walk away from a bad breakup with a sour taste in their mouth.
And if his ex really did a number on this guy, it would make sense that he would have some bad feelings towards her.
If you notice any one of the following issues in the man you’re dating, take it as a warning that he may be lacking in important qualities that help make a relationship successful.
These include respecting others and having healthy emotional boundaries (knowing where one person ends and the other person begins).
Also, take note if his language and behavior demonstrate that he doesn’t view women as equals in a partnership. What are his attitudes towards women, work, and a woman’s role in the home?
Does he make quips about women and their intelligence or emotional “volatility”? Whatever his attitudes are, the important thing to note is, “do his attitudes match up with perspective?It’s like those articles that say something to the effect of “divorced men make great partners because they know how to commit since they’ve committed to marriage before,”…unless, of course, he’s a serial cheater, which might be the reason he got divorced in the first place.People commit to each other and get married for all sorts of reasons.They’d been together for 10 years, married for two. James and I have our ups and our downs in what could be called “still the honeymoon phase.” And many of them, frankly, have to do with how he used to be married to someone else. There’s some immediate satisfaction of knowing, of course. I’m sorry to say it, but this one’s a real lose/lose. The recently divorced man is, with little exception, the recently traumatized man.They’d met young, in their early 20s, and had decided, two months before James and I met, to divorce. James had been the one to request the divorce; his wife had been devastated by his decision. There’s not a week that goes by that I don’t think either A) I’m thrilled he’s got that experience under his belt, or B) Why god, did I have to fall in love with a guy with an ex-wife? But beyond that, it’s just a device with which to torture yourself. If he dumped her, you think, “What’s to stop him from dumping me? You’re destined to wonder – however briefly – how much of him is still in love with her. And if you’re the one who winds up with him, it will fall upon you to help him cope. A man with a now-defunct marriage under his belt has learned a few things about himself, about what he has to work on, about what he can and cannot handle.All this information came up over the course of our 10-hour date, and to some extent, the process of James discussing it was akin to someone waving a red flag in my face. The point of course is this: There are some serious pros to dating a divorced guy. The Cons: (I thought we’d get the negatives out of the way first. ” You’ll have to manage her continued pining, her continued pursuit. You will see him see old photos, you will see him cry or scream or fume or mourn. And – lest it bears mention – this is all as much fun as… A guy who’s lived with a woman for a significant period of time has a pretty good sense of what to say and when to say it. If you’re boyfriend’s divorced, you can be 99 percent sure he’s lived with someone else for a while and has a solid understanding of shared space as a result. A divorce is a horrible thing to be sure, but from what I’ve observed, it’s also pretty humbling.